you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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