So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
