A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
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