i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
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I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
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I've been randomly kik messaging bearded men I find on Instagram while sitting unshowered in my underpants. I'm like the girl version of a creepy uncle.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
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