Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I am one with the molecules
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
Randomize
