Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
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