wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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