My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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