btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize