I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
I wish i was in the wii world.
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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