So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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