they need to just BURY HIM!
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
I still have a little drunk in my system
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Randomize
