Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Randomize
