:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
