3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize
