i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I just got carded by a ten year old.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
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