I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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