therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
