Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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