Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Randomize
