I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Randomize
