were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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