I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
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I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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