I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
NoShamevember. You game?
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
