Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
he told me I talked like a deaf person
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
my question is who was more confortable? You sleeping on the floor or me tweeting from a bush?
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
