Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize