I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
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