my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
