You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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