She is in my trunk
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
