He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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