these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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