it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
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