I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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