It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I have a scary feeling my mom might switch her goals from finding me a husband in 2012 to sending me to rehab
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Randomize
