He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
last night I used snow as a chaser
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Randomize
