Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
