I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize