Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
I'm the only person I know who could have actual sex and then dream about my vibrator.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
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