Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Randomize