i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
Randomize
