ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
