Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
When was the last time you got laid?
When was the last time you came home sober?
touche
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
