im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
You took a bar mat shot.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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