You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
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