are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
