it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
