yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
My bed smells like the plague
Randomize