a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
time to smoke my breakfast
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
