you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
