I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
No I am not eating basil off your cock
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
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