Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
He is an equal opportunity slut.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
I think my moral compass just broke
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
